Learn How to Trust God’s Plan: Stop Comparing Yourself

Comparison is the thief of joy.

How many times have you heard that line? If you’re anything like me, probably more times than you can count. Yet, somehow, it still doesn’t always sink in, does it?

It’s so easy to feel discouraged when you’re watching others make progress, especially when it looks like they have more than you. More money, more connections, more opportunities. Sometimes, it even feels like everything just works out for them, while you’re left wondering when your turn will come.

But have you ever paused and really thought about this:

What if God provides exactly what you need, when you need it?

What if that dream He placed in your heart came with the resources to fulfill it, not all at once, but piece by piece, as you grow into the person who can carry it?

God has a way of making things align, even when it looks like the odds are stacked against you. He works quietly, sometimes in the background, but faithfully, making a way where there seems to be none.

Today, I want to share a little story with you.

It’s about the time I entered a beauty pageant in high school, broke, uncertain and intimidated, but somehow, against all odds, I walked away with something I never expected…

A Mother’s Encouragement

When I was in high school, my mom encouraged me to enter the ninth-grade beauty pageant. That might sound normal to some people, but for me? It was strange- really strange. All my life my mother had told me that I was too fat, that I needed to lose weight and look a certain way. So for her to suddenly push me toward something as appearance-focused as a beauty pageant? It threw me off But she was serious. 

We would sit and talk about the kinds of questions I might be asked, and she coached me on how to answer them. It was the first time my mom and I truly bonded over something.

A little back story, I was born and raised in Jamaica, where most people speak patois (pronounced patwah), a kind of broken English. In school, however, we were required to speak proper English to our teachers and for anything academic.we could speak Patois to our friends, but not in formal settings as it was seen a “less than”. 

So my mom would help me practice these pageant questions in her best English. it wasn’t perfect but she tried so hard, and her effort meant everything to me.

One of her favorite questions to prep me for was,

“Who is your role model?”

She insisted that I say, “Miss Sonia Sotomayor,” because, as she proudly told me, “She was the first woman to ever serve on the U.S. Supreme Court!” Now that I’m older, I realize-Sonia Sotomayor wasn’t actually the first woman, she was the third. But she was the first Latina. Her facts weren’t perfect, but her heart was in the right place. 

Defeat Before Trying

Aside from all the excitement, I had to put in some real work. During lunchtime, a few of my classmates, who knew I was entering the pageant, would help me practice my supermodel walk. We’d clear a little space, and they’d offer critiques and pointers “Swing your hips more,” “Don’t look down,” “Own the stage!” Their support made it fun, even though I was nervous, and it felt like I was having a 50,000-coaches moment, just like in Akeelah and the Bee.

We were also all required to collect donations for the pageant. Each contestant was given a legal-sized sheet of paper where donors could write their names, sign, and record how much they contributed. The girl who raised the most money would win the title of “Most Popular.”

I worked really hard to ask around for donations, going to neighbors, friends, and anyone I thought might be willing to give. But then I heard something that crushed my motivation. One of the contestants’ moms worked at a bank, and she brought her daughter’s donation sheet to work. Customers had been donating generously, and they had already raised $20,000 JMD, which was about $225 USD back in 2010.

The moment I heard that, I felt completely discouraged. I knew there was no realistic way I could compete with that kind of reach and support. So honestly, I just stopped trying. I gave up on collecting donations because I believed I had already lost that round before it even really began.

The Pageant Perfect Dress

We also had to go shopping for formal wear. One of the girls had it easy, her mom was a designer and was making her custom gown. The girl whose mom worked at the bank was even traveling overseas to buy her daughter’s dress and other costumes, my mom didn’t have any money to spare for mine.

I remember she gave me $1,000 JMD, which, back in 2010, was around $6– $7 USD. I took that money and went all over town, searching for a dress that could fit my tiny budget. Store after store, I came up empty as everything was too expensive.

But then, just when I was about to give up, I walked into a store and saw a dress on the clearance rack for exactly $1,000 JMD. It felt like divine timing. The dress had spaghetti straps, which we weren’t allowed to wear, but I couldn’t leave it there for that price. I told myself I’d just get a thin scarf to drape around my arms and shoulders to make it work.

I didn’t have enough money for shoes, though. Strangely, I hadn’t even thought that far ahead. I was just focused on making it to pageant day with something to wear.

Pageant Day

On the day of the pageant, all the contestants were excused from class early to start getting ready. Parents showed up with curling irons, makeup bags, suitcases of accessories, but my mom didn’t come. She was supposed to help me get dressed, but she never showed up.

I remember standing in the changing room with a knot in my stomach as I began to panic. A couple of older girls saw me and offered to help. If they helped someone in the pageant, they’d get in free, so it worked out for both of us. They did my hair, my makeup, and one of them even had a pair of shoes I could borrow. They weren’t anything fancy, but they fit, and that was more than enough.

Then came the talent segment. When they asked what I had prepared, I admitted I didn’t have anything rehearsed. Their eyes widened like I had said something completely outrageous. But here’s the thing, I may not have had the fanciest dress or collected the most money, but when it came to talent, I knew exactly what I was bringing to the table: the gift God gave me, making people laugh.

So I stepped onto that stage and did stand-up comedy.

And you know what? The crowd loved it. They laughed and cheered and that gave me the confidence to go on. I definitely wasn’t perfect, but I gave it my all, using my raw talent and stepping up to the plate.

Make the Most of What You Have

When it came time for us to show off our casual outfits followed by evening wear, I remember being completely mesmerized. The girl whose mom worked at the bank came out in the latest high-top designer shoes, I had never seen anything like it in person. And the one whose mom was a fashion designer? She wore a showstopping outfit inspired by the Pink Panther. It was absolutely stunning, straight out of a magazine. I felt small. Intimidated. Like I didn’t belong on the same stage.

For my casual wear, I wore the best jeans and top I owned, paired with the same borrowed shoes from earlier. Then came the evening wear. I put on the clearance-rack dress I’d found and wrapped a scarf around my arms to make it more modest and the same shoes again. I did the best I could with what I had.

Then came the Q&A portion. The question I was asked was, “If you could change one thing about yourself, what would it be, and why?” Whew. At the time, I had so many insecurities running through my mind, I didn’t even know where to begin. But instead of going deep into all of that, I gave what I now call my political answer.

I remember starting off by saying, “I do not have the confidence to dare change anything about myself.” And to my surprise, the crowd started cheering. I honestly can’t remember what else I said after that, everything was a blur, but I remember feeling proud for standing tall in that moment.

Comparison is The Thief of Joy: What the Pageant Taught Me

At the end of the pageant, they began handing out individual category awards before announcing the winners. That’s when I heard it:

“Best Dressed… me!”

Wait, what? Me? I was shocked, completely floored. I had thought for sure I had the least impressive outfit of all the girls on that stage. But that moment taught me something I’ve carried with me ever since:

Never compare what you’re doing to what someone else has. What you carry might not look like much, but when God’s hand is in it, it shines differently.

I ended up placing third overall. The girl with the sparkly new shoes and the big donations? She didn’t even place. That really surprised me.

“To those who use well what they are given, even more will be given, and they will have an abundance. But from those who do nothing, even what little they have will be taken away.”

Looking back now, I realize I started with the little that God had already placed in my hands and along the way, He provided everything else I needed to keep going. That experience wasn’t just about a crown. It was about learning how God shows up when you trust Him, even when things seem impossible.

My mom did show up, just a little too late. She said she mixed up the time and thought it was happening later in the day. But she was incredibly proud and excited to hear how everything turned out. We talked all the way home and that’s a memory that I’ll cherish forever.

Now, years later, as I reflect on that experience, I’m reminded and reassured that if God gives you a dream, He’s already given you the tools to start. And even if you feel like you’re lacking, if you walk with Him in faith, He’ll provide the rest along the way.

You Never Know Who Will Be Inspired By You

A couple of years later, during my final year of high school, a ninth grader came up to me one day. She said she was entering the pagaent and wanted me to be her coach.

Wow. That moment was full-circle for me. While I was busy doubting myself years prior, someone else in the crowd was watching… and being inspired.

She went on to place first, and I was beyond proud of her.

So here’s my final word to you:

Get up. Dust off those dreams you’ve left sitting on the shelf. You may not have all the pieces yet, but if God gave you the vision, He’ll provide the provision. Trust Him.

I dare you, yes, dare you, to have a faith bigger than a mustard seed. Step into the unknown and just watch what happens.

Because you never know who’s watching… and being inspired.